What Is Self-Sabotaging Behavior?
Self-sabotaging is a behavior in which a person undermines their own success. They do this in order to protect themselves from an internal need to feel important or special, or from a fear of being vulnerable.
Sometimes self-sabotage can be a way of creating an excuse for not achieving certain goals because it can be easier to blame it on the behavior. It is also a way that people create drama and excitement in their lives without realizing they are doing so.
WHAT ARE THE CAUSES OF SELF-SABOTAGE?
There are countless reasons and causes for self-sabotage. However, I’d like to draw attention to the three following categories:
1. We Feel Like We Cannot Make a Difference
When we think about our goals and what we want to accomplish, we often feel like it’s not worth the time and effort because nothing will change anyway.
2. We’re Afraid of Success
We’ve been taught that success means hard work, sacrifice, and responsibility, which can be overwhelming to someone who is not ready for that kind of pressure.
3. The Need to Belong or Be Accepted By Others
For example, when someone receives too much praise or public acknowledgment in the past, he might go out of his way to downgrade himself in order to avoid attention and avoid being in a position where people may judge him.
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO OVERCOME SELF-SABOTAGE BEHAVIOR?
By understanding why we engage in these types of behaviors and what triggers them, we can take the necessary steps to prevent ourselves from hurting ourselves again. This will result in an increase in self-worth and productivity.
1. Acknowledging The Importance Of Mental Health
It’s important to remember that everything starts from within, so if you don’t treat your mind well, you’re bound to end up hurting yourself in some other way because your mental health will only get worse over time and eventually manifest.
2. Stop Comparing Yourself With Others
Comparing yourself to others is a form of self-defeating behavior that is harmful to your mental health. When you compare yourself with others, you are forcing yourself into a competition that you will always end up losing.
It’s not because there’s anything wrong with you, it’s because everyone has different strengths and weaknesses, and it doesn’t make sense to measure them against one another.
3. Take Risks and Challenge Yourself
If you find yourself being held back from taking risks and challenging yourself, it might be a sign that you have self-defeating behavior. You may be feeling so stuck in your life or so overwhelmed by the options before you that it feels easier to just give up.
But the truth is, there are many ways to take risks and challenge yourself without going as far as jumping off a cliff! Start taking calculated risks with small things. Eventually, you’ll get comfortable taking risks for good.
4. Stay Away From Distractions
It’s hard to stay focused when we’re surrounded by distractions. Mobile phones are the main reason for getting distracted and diverting your focus. Turn off all your mobile notifications. Keep your phone facing upside down to overcome the urge to constantly check it during work hours.
Lack of quality sleep drops your energy, concentration, and focus. Improve your sleep quality and get a good night’s sleep.
5. Take Action Reduce Workplace Stress
Procrastination is a common practice that can lead to a variety of problems. Delay in completing your tasks silently builds up your self-defeating behavior.
Avoiding work stress and delays in completing tasks is key to having a productive workday. There are many ways to do this, including breaking big projects into small chunks and delegating tasks to others. Identify your important goals for the day and take steps to complete them to start with.
6. Forget Your Mistakes in the Past and Be Kind to Yourself
Self-sabotage is an act of defiance that can lead to feelings of depression, stress, and detachment. It’s important to forgive yourself for the mistakes you’ve made in the past. Learn from what you’ve done wrong and keep moving forward. Journaling is one good method to track your activities.
Write down your daily plan and actions you have taken and review each day what went right and wrong. This way, you can be your own mentor to correct yourself and focus on your goals.
Final Thoughts
Self-sabotage is a serious concern for many people. It can manifest in the form of addiction, abuse of substances, overworking, or even overeating. Do not neglect to identify if there is a change in behavior.
Luckily, there are many ways you can avoid these behaviors and become happy and successful in your life. The key is to be mindful and take steps to make changes to overcome such behaviors.
